Importance of Navy Ratings

Four sailors stand on the deck arguing about the merits of their ratings.

"We hull technicians keep us afloat," says the first.

"Quartermasters get us where we're going," says the second.

As the disbursing clerk and electrician's mate join the fray, the ship hits an iceberg, sinks, and all hands are lost. In seconds, the four sailors find themselves standing on a cloud before the Pearly Gates.

"What's the problem?" St. Peter asks the unruly group.

"We can't agree on which Navy rating is the most important," answers the hull technician.

"That doesn't matter here," says St. Peter. "All are equally treasured in heaven."

The sailors grumble for a moment. The quartermaster finally says, "We're not coming in until we find out which is the most important rating."

"Very well," says St. Peter. He raises his arms wide and a dove descends from the skies carrying in its beak a glistening white paper. A harp glissando resounds as the dove lands on St. Peter's shoulder. The saint takes the sheet of paper and reads the message aloud:

FROM: THE ALMIGHTY.

TO: RECENT NAVAL ARRIVALS

SUBJ: RELATIVE IMPORTANCE OF NAVY RATINGS

The Navy's mission depends on the effective integration of all its ratings. While some may require more rigorous training and hold its members to higher standards than others, all ratings are honored in heaven. Accept this and enjoy your eternal reward.

Sincerely,

GOD, MUCM, USN (Ret)